The ‘outer’ course of sexual pleasure

Want to give your woman a real orgasm? Go for outercourse and not intercourse for real sexual pleasure. We show you how.

By: Editorial Team | | Published: July 14, 2019 7:06 pm

Outercourse basically means every sexual activity that do not include penetration. © Shutterstock

Do you believe that sex and intercourse are synonymous? If yes, how would you feel if we say that they are actually not? Sex is not limited to penetration and it does not even have to be included in sex at all. Just outercourse can do the needful. This is what science says. According to a survey published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, most women need clitoral stimulation more than sex to have an orgasm. Researchers asked 1,055 women, between the age of 18 and 94, to answer some questions related to their sexual lives. This was done to know about the sexual preferences of women and the contribution of clitoral and vaginal stimulation in their orgasm.

Researchers saw that only around 18 per cent of women said that they climaxed during intercourse from vaginal penetration alone. About 36 per cent reported that they needed clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm during intercourse and another 36 per cent said that clitoral stimulation actually acts as a bonus and enhances sexual pleasure.

So, the next time you see your women showing satisfaction after plain vaginal sex, know that, most probably, she is faking it. Women apparently do so to please their partners.

So, take some time out, talk to your partner and understand what she likes and how she wants to be touched. Don’t rush into sex. Just focus more on foreplay. Basically, what we are trying to convey is, try outercourse more often.

Does outercourse really works?

Yes, it does. Outercourse basically means every sexual activity that do not include penetration. It can be touching, kissing, giving erotic massage, and using sex toys. Some orgasms feel better than others, says 78 per cent of the survey respondents. And, better orgasms are not associated with the duration of sexual encounter. It is the emotional intimacy, clitoral stimulation, basically foreplay matters.

A woman’s sexual pleasure also depends on her mood and stress levels. You may be surprised to know that 41 per cent of women involved in the survey reported to like only one kind of touch. But, do their partners know this? Most probably, no. That is why we say that communication is the key. Talk to your better half about your preferences so that you can get what you want. Your partner will find it thrilling too.

Tips to give your woman sexual pleasure

Yes, the organ that helps a woman orgasm is her clitoris. A lot like the male penis, this tiny organ is hidden under a hood between a lady’s genital lips. Packed with blood vessels, the clitoris becomes erect when aroused. But unlike the penis, it can be extremely sensitive and therefore it has the hood to lower that sensation a bit.

Since the positions you would assume during penetration may not stimulate the clitoris, a good option is to use your mouth or fingers to do so and make her orgasm. Again, this requires some amount of technique and finesse. So, to help you out, here are a few tips

Change the way you stimulate her

The come hither motion (where you bend your fingers and stroke her G-spot) is not the best way to go at it. And that is not enough to make her orgasm. So, maybe it’s time to change things. Remember how we told you that women achieve an orgasm by clitoral stimulation and not penetration. So, you have to spend some quality time with her clitoris to give her that orgasmic high.

Cut your nails

Make sure you cut your nails and file them before you use them to pleasure your woman’s vagina or clitoris. The skin in that area is extremely sensitive and can easily get hurt with jagged nails.

Pay attention to her vagina

Her vaginal area should be well lubricated, if not, consider using a lubricant for this propose. If you go in without any lubrication, you will hurt her and that is a definite downer.

Find the clitoris, recognise it and treat it right

Yes, this is an essential tip. Touching it the right way can make for the perfect sexual romp. Do it wrong and you might not get any response. The clitoris is a small, cartilaginous structure present under a hood. This entire package is present at the point that your lady’s genital lips begin (the point where they both meet towards her belly button).

Be gentle

Women prefer soft and gentle motions, especially over their clitoris. Not only is it an extremely sensitive spot but being harsh can just be uncomfortable. So, make sure you start off using light pressure and motion. Once you see that your partner is aroused enough, you can proceed to moving faster or even using a little more pressure. Using gentle circular motions is the best way to stimulate the clitoris.

Stimulate the entire region

You can even spice things up by stimulating the entire region. Move your fingers (your index and middle finger) from her clitoris to her vaginal opening and move upwards on the other side. Doing this a few times can help make things a lot hotter and surprise her too. Plus, it gives her clitoris a little break which can increase the sexual pleasure.

Moving on to her vagina

Once she is sufficiently aroused, you can take two fingers and gently push them into her vagina. You can use the tips of your fingers to stimulate her G-spot (present on the front wall of her vagina — the area facing her abdomen) or her A-spot (present towards her spine). Here’s a guide to finding and stimulating the G-spot.

Multitask

Okay, we don’t mean watching a movie or reading a book while you stimulate her vagina. But what you actually need to do is, when you are using one hand to stimulate the inside wall of her vagina, use the other hand to stimulate her clitoris. This can be extremely pleasurable and make her orgasm more powerful.

Don’t change anything

It is quite common for you to think that the moment your partner starts to get aroused and is close to climaxing, you should change things up so as to intensify it. But this is one of the worst mistakes you can make. So, when she starts to become more vocal and is about to have an orgasm, don’t change a thing. Just keep doing the same motion and watch her have the best orgasm of her life.

Published : July 14, 2019 7:06 pm

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