Benching – another unreasonable dating trend you should beware of

Benching means just leading you on with no intentions of commitment.

By: Bhakti Paun Sharma | | Updated: November 22, 2017 10:29 am

The dating scenario isn t all rosy anymore. In the world of Tinder, OkCupid and other dating apps, people engage in casual relationships, one night stands, and even hook up on and off. Then there are open relationships where one has the free will to date other people, even when in the relationship and a terrible trend called ghosting. In ghosting, a person just vanishes from your life. They suddenly stop all kinds of communication even without a formal break-up. Now if you thought this is a terrible trend, read more about Benching. Also Read - Quarantine romance: Video dating in the time of COVID-19 pandemic

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Benching is a dating trend where the person in most cases the guy doesn t let go of the relationship but isn t committed either. They do not indicate any kind of serious dedication to the bond you both share but throw all the hints and keep reminding you that they want to be with you. It s completely baseless and as if someone has put you on the backburner. Read: Submarining: An awful dating trend you have to watch out for!

Signs you are being benched

He never meets you or goes out on dates with you.
He does not engage in very meaningful conversations or talk about very personal things.
He does not ask you a lot of questions about your life but still shows interest.
He sends you flirt messages from time to time to keep you hooked on.
He keeps a constant check on whether you are still with him and the moment he sees you drifting elsewhere, he mushrooms up to win you back. Read: 10 signs that your boyfriend doesn t really love you.
He convinces you and makes you believe that he is really interested in being with you and sees a connection. However, the reality is that he has it all figured out in his mind and is not looking forward to committing to you.
You are left confused because he never adheres to your plans but still constantly stays in touch through calls and messages and even apologizes for not making time for meeting you often.
You were dating each other and the relationship was going well and then he suddenly starts doing everything mentioned above. Read: Types of men women should never date.

Why does he bench you?

It is an ego booster for most men. They like to know that they are extremely important for someone.
They don t want to lose you but don t want to keep you either.
You are a backup plan for them. They might even use you or come back to you each time they break up with someone else (beware, you might not even know he s dating someone else).
This practice takes minimal effort. All he needs to do is send a few texts and call once in a while. Dating, hanging out, or other commitments don t come into picture.

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Published : November 22, 2017 10:26 am | Updated:November 22, 2017 10:29 am

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