Childbirth is a beautiful experience but how you give birth might not always be your decision. Most mothers have the desire to have a normal delivery (vaginal birth). Many opt for water birth or hypnobirthing. But not all mothers can have a normal delivery. Complications during pregnancy like fetal distress, labour problems, incompetent cervix and other issues can make C-section imperative.
As a mother, I have observed that some people look down upon mothers who undergo a C-section, especially in India. Some blame the mother or her family for resorting to C-section, calling it an easy way out, not understanding the many complications that have led the mother-to-be opt for it. I beg to differ here having undergone a C-section myself when my labour pains just stopped mid-way. For people who think C-section is easier or more convenient than normal delivery, let me tell you a few things we C-section mums want you to know.
1. It isn t an easy decision
Some don' think C-section is a big deal. They think the woman just needs to be wheeled inside the OT and then be taken over by doctors to cut open her and take the baby out. Hell no, this isn t easy as it sounds. It s scary! Undergoing a C-section is not like experiencing a minor cut but undergoing a major surgery which has its own risks. And it doesn t end there. After your child comes into the world, you lie on the bed helplessly as it takes more than 24 hours at times to be able to sit and hold your baby. I cried my heart out since I could not hold my baby immediately after she arrived. Whoever said C-section was easy.
2. The recovery is not just six weeks
That is what your gynaecologist or the hospital staff might tell you. But believe me; it takes more than six weeks to return to your normal self. My gynaecologist reminded me not to be upset with the aches and pains that followed while the stitches took the time to heal. I still remember her telling me, A C-section means a deep cut that runs several layers down to the uterus. Don t expect a magical healing. Every body takes its own time to heal. Be patient. True to her words it took almost six months to be pain-free after the C-section. So it is better not to judge a mother who went for a C-section because her pains don t stop after childbirth.
3. C-section can be made easy and soothing for both mother and baby
People who support vaginal births claim that C-section might be a stressful event for the baby and this can leave a long lasting impression on the little one s mind. Well, I am not sure how true this could be, but I know that you can make your child s first few moments soothing even if you have a C-section, like playing garbha sanskar shlokas in the background, keeping the lights dim and demanding for skin-to-skin touch right after the birth. Yes, there are ways to have a mother-child friendly C-section too.
4. C-sections mothers bond well with their kids
Many prenatal and parenting coaches will tell you that babies born vaginally bond better with their mothers. I don't believe in this. It isn t possible that your child whom you have cherished and nurtured for so long in your womb, will not bond with you because you didn t push her through the birth canal. The connection between the mother and child is deep and a C-section definitely does not come in the way of that beautiful bond.
5. C-section has nothing to do with intelligence, aggression or tantrums
I was once told (when a so-called well-wisher saw my super energetic toddler) that C-section babies are a little problematic. They have temper tantrums, are less intelligent and show aggressive behaviour. Oh really! Aren t temper tantrums, aggression and a knack for learning new things a part of growing up years? Somebody needs to tell these naysayers that character building happens with relentless parenting and spending quality time with kids. The mode of birth has very less to contribute in this case. Do not make a mother anxious by saying such things.
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