How to plan for a birth without violence

All you need to know about a birth without violence

By: Debjani Arora | | Updated: November 2, 2015 6:55 pm

Tags: C-section Labour & delivery Pregnant women

Birthing is a beautiful natural phenomenon. But how you birth, decides whether you will impart peace or trauma to your little one. The process of birthing is painful and traumatic. Your little one experiences and goes through the same emotions as you. Hence the onus is always on the mother to make sure that the baby is brought into the world happy and in good spirits. You can choose to do this despite the ordeal of labour pains. You can help your baby birth without being subjected to any violence or distress. Also Read - Pregnancy stereotypes at workplace pushing women to work extra hard, risking their health

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‘Birth without violence’ is a term commonly used today in the circles of spiritual birth practitioners, hypnobirthing practitioners, and those supporting natural birthing. This simply means to birth the baby with minimal or no external interventions. To create an environment that mimics the calmness and silence of the womb during the birth. ‘Too much medical intervention or unnecessary intrusions like say the use of a forcep or vacuuming can lead to some amount of trauma to the child. This traumatic experience can make the newcomer averse to the new environment and the transition from the womb to world challenging,’ says Jaypali Shetty, hypnobirthing practitioner, Mumbai.

Many experts also believe that the baby’s first cry among other things also indicate the pain and distress the little one had to face while birthing. A scream sent out while crying indicates that the entry of your bundle of joy was not all that joyous. But crying is not all that bad for your baby, know more reasons why crying is important for your little one.

What difference will a birth without violence make?

You might think that comforting a crying baby with a feed or swaddling up will make the pain and trauma of birth less distressing. But that is not the case. ‘Ones birthing experience has a lifelong mark on the person and it decides a lot about the physiological and psychological wellbeing,’ says Jaypali. Also birthing is responsible for the way a person looks towards life. ‘The way we handle the challenges and take hurdles in our stride all stems from that experience which we faced while entering the world,’ says Jaypali. So even if you do not realize it your own birthing experience is what that has shaped you to become the person you are today and is also probably responsible for the kind of mother you would be. Though you can’t do much about your own birthing experience now, but you can do a lot to ensure that your baby comes into the world in peace and is more welcoming of the environment around.

What are the benefits of birth without violence?

A birth without violence:

Helps in better bonding with the mother and baby.
Helps to start breastfeeding without many hitches.
Helps baby to adjust to the new environment better helping to sleep well and be calm.
Ensures less chances of getting an infection.
Boosts better immunity.

What you can do to achieve birth without violence?

To make sure that your baby is born in harmony and in a serene environment, follow these tips:

Plan for a birth which is natural and make sure you have a birth plan ready to discuss your options. You can opt for home birth, hypnobirth, water birth or lotus birth. Try and find out a practitioner who is affectionate and caring towards you. That is what you need when you are in labour. Speak to your doctor if a natural birthing would be possible in the hospital you are visiting. Else look for a holistic birthing centre. Know how to draft a perfect birth plan.
If your pregnancy is a high risk one which would call for medical interventions ask your doctor or your antenatal coach how to make your baby feel calm and relaxed about the birthing.
It’s important that you are confident and relaxed while you enter the labour room. ‘If the mother goes into a flight or fight mode at birth this is going to affect the baby no matter what kind of birthing you choose,’ informs Jaypali. Practice correct breathing, ask for help if you are in too much pain and keep talking to your baby even during the advance stages of labour. This will help your baby to reflect on the joys and positivity that you are exuding while in pain and rub it off on your baby too. Know more about the natural birthing options.
In case of any emergency remember not to panic as that will only add to the distress your baby is already going through.
In case you need to undergo a C-section or plan for one this definitely cannot promise you a birth without violence. Be sure that your reunion with your baby helps you reestablish the skin to skin contact to help your baby feel at ease. Start breastfeeding as soon as you can. ‘In case of a C-section the baby’s natural reflexes are not met and so there is always a higher chance of trauma or distress. It’s important either you create a tranquil environment for your baby to enter the world or give enough skin to skin to ensure security and take refuge in your arms,’ says Jaypali.

How can you create a birthing friendly environment for your baby?

Whether you choose to birth your baby at home, a birthing centre or in a hospital set up, arrange for the following to help your baby feel at ease:

Keep the lights dimmed: In case of an emergency or C-section where you might be subjected to harsh lights ask the doctor to at least pull the curtains, speak in hushed voice and help you be calm.
Ask for your baby to be handled gently and slowly: Whether you believe it or not, a baby knows if the hands that touch are loving, careless or rejecting. In rigid hostile hands a baby would retreat, only in a care and loving hands will your baby feel more welcoming and open up. Many couples decide that the father should be the first one to hold the baby. But not all men have the guts to stand through the entire labour. If your partner isn’t sure, chose a hospital attendant or midwife to do it for you. Ideally establish a relationship with the attendant or midwife during your antenatal appointments. A friendly nurse or attendant would tend to be more caring towards your baby. Many hospitals give you an option to choose an attendant for your needs; work it out if you can exercise one.
Ask your doctor to keep the cord intact for a while: Ideally the placenta that delivers after the child still provides the baby with food and vital nutrients. It is supposed to dry and fall all on its own. But in practice the doctor would clamp the cord right after the birth. Request your doctor to wait for a while before the contact is cut. At least ask your doctor to wait till the placenta is still vibrating with life.
Wait till your baby is settled: You might be elated and eager to show your baby to the world. But wait till you know that you baby is settles and is ready to take on the world. Let the crying phase get over and spend the initial moments with your baby alone before everyone tries to get their share of time with your baby.
Be the first one to take your baby: In case of a natural birth this can be possible but if you have to undergo a C-section still demand that your baby is put on your chest for a breast crawl even if for few minutes. Of course the stitches and scar would bother you, but it’s better not to miss on this window period. Read to know the benefits of a breast crawl.
Ask for a warm water birth for your baby: You might have no control over this but still ask the attendant for it and do it with all politeness, if you have any left after a tiring labour. A bath in water close to the temperature in the womb will soothe your baby’s senses.