Self-controlled children likelier to grow up to be healthier adults: Here’s how to teach your child self-control

People who had higher levels of self-control as children tend to be healthier and biologically younger, have more positive views of aging and are more satisfied with life in middle age, say researchers.

By: Longjam Dineshwori | | Updated: January 6, 2021 6:58 pm

Children aren’t born with self-control– they can be taught to develop self-control. @Shutterstock

As parents, we all want our child to lead a longer and healthier life. Apart from giving them good food and instilling healthy habits in your kids, teach them self-control as well to keep them away from diseases. Because self-controlled children tend to be healthier middle-aged adults, suggests a study, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. Also Read - Parenting tips: Hope you’re not making this biggest parenting mistake

The researchers defined self-control as the ability to contain one’s own thoughts, feelings and behaviours, and to work toward goals with a plan. Self-control is one of the personality traits that makes a child ready for school as well as life. Also Read - Importance of child vaccination: Keeping up with easy to go immunization schedule

For the study, the researchers tracked a thousand people from birth through age 45 in New Zealand. They found that people who had higher levels of self-control as children were ageing more slowly than their peers at age 45. The bodies and brains of the higher self-control group were also found to be healthier and biologically younger. They were able to walk faster and have younger-looking faces at age 45 as well. Also Read - Parenting tips: Ways to lower stress and increase joy as a mom

Those with higher self-control tend to be better equipped to handle the health, financial and social challenges of later life. They also expressed more positive views of aging and felt more satisfied with life in middle age.

Self-control in early life may prepare your child for healthy ageing

Today more people are growing older, and living longer with age-related diseases, noted Leah Richmond-Rakerd, an assistant professor at the University of Michigan, who is the first author on the study.

“It’s important to identify ways to help individuals prepare successfully for later-life challenges, and live more years free of disability. We found that self-control in early life may help set people up for healthy ageing,” he said.

Self-control can be taught, and the researchers suggested that a societal investment in such training could improve life span and quality of life, not only in childhood, but also perhaps in midlife. As an example, they cited that changing behaviours in midlife like quitting smoking or taking up exercise leads to improved outcomes.

Ageing well requires us to get prepared, physically, financially, and socially, said Terrie Moffitt, the Nannerl O. Keohane Professor of Psychology & Neuroscience at Duke, and last author on the paper.

Moffitt added that people who have used self-control since childhood are far more prepared for ageing than their same-age peers.

How to teach your child self-control

We aren’t born with self-control– it’s something that we hone as we grow. Most people can be taught to exercise self-control. Here are some ways to teach your child self-control.

Discuss about it often

Talk about how being self-controlled helped improved your life and become a better you. Share examples of when and how you’ve shown self-control. Discuss about self-control more often. Gradually, they’ll begin to apply it in their own lives and start sharing their examples too.

Teach your child away to stay calm

What do you do way to avoid losing your control, stay calm and make wise choices? Share the trick with your kids too. Whenever they are about to lose control, gently remind them to stay calm.

Play self-control games with them

Games that require a child to follow instructions or patterns, listen, be controlled, and make changes may be a great way to teach your kids the value of self-control. Freeze, sleeping lions, drumming/rhythm games or red light, green light are some games that were found to increase self-control.

Improve your child’s Self-Awareness

Help your child to understand the things that tend to diminish their capacity for self-control. Explore what triggers impulsive decisions in them. Is it tiredness, stress, hunger, boredom, anxiety? One they become aware of these triggers, they can navigate these challenges better and improve self-control. Self-awareness can help your kids recognize their strengths and their challenges as well as have control over their behaviours.

Published : January 6, 2021 6:56 pm | Updated:January 6, 2021 6:58 pm

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