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Parenting is not an easy job. It involves a lot of patience and attention to detail. You have to be constantly alert and on your toes. Different parents have different approaches and they adopt various parenting styles when it comes to raising their kids. Today, we have terms like hands-on parenting, elephant parenting and free-range parenting among many others. Helicopter parenting and lenient parenting are also often used terms.
But what exactly does it mean? Let us take a look at these two parenting styles and see how it makes a difference in kids' lives.
You may be guilty of helicopter parenting if you are overly focussed on your children. You tend to always hover over your child and hence the term helicopter parenting. You tend to take too much stress over your child's performance and achievements. You over control, overprotect and try to make them too perfect. It becomes an obsession with you. This is not healthy because your child may feel suffocated with all this attention and all your efforts may backfire. Your child may lose confidence in himself and his coping skills will remain undeveloped. He may be prone to anxiety attacks and not very well versed in life skills. Children of helicopter parenting may also have a sense of entitlement.
On the other hand, lenient parenting style, also known as permissive parenting, is the exact opposite of helicopter parenting. Here, parents have very few rules for their children and there are even fewer expectations. They are, no doubt, very loving, but they usually view their children as kids who cannot be trusted with any responsibility. They have no expectations and rarely discipline their children and avoid confrontations. Children of lenient parenting are like to perform poorly in academics and exhibit behavioural problems. They are also more likely to keep their feelings to themselves.
Both these parenting styles are not good for children. They are both two extreme concepts that can harm children in the long run. The best parenting style is on that takes a bit from both. Let us see how you can strike a balance.
As a parent, you can't be breathing down your child's neck all the time. You need to give him some space. At the same time, don't shy away from your responsibilities totally. Your child needs you, just not all the time. Be a good parent by appreciating the small and big achievements in your child's life. This will boost his self-esteem. Never, ever, compare him to another child. Your child is unique.
Parents usually notice all bad things in their kids and rebuke them for it. But be alert to the good stuff too and praise your kid when he deserves it. Be generous with your hugs and compliments.
But don't shy away from disciplining them when the need arises. Be sure to set limits and stick to it. Discipline is important and it teaches kids about acceptable behaviours and self-control. Be flexible and willing to adjust according to circumstances. Spend a lot of quality time with your children and try to be a good role model. And, above all, let your child know that you love him. All this will help you in creating an unbreakable bond with your child.