12 sex tips for people with lower back pain

12 sex tips for people with lower back pain

Is your sex life suffering due to your lower back pain? Here are a few tips that can help you beat the pain and have awesome sex.

Written by Editorial Team |Updated : November 28, 2014 9:34 AM IST

Lower back pain can ruin your sex life. It may not only instill a fear of sex in your mind but also gradually lower your sex drive. While it s true that back pain can really be frustrating, it doesn t mean you cannot have sex at all as long as you're ready to try a different approaches and make your sex life interesting. Here are some approaches that would surely suit you.

Discuss it with your partner: Lower back pain may introduce minor physical limitations in your sex life. But if you don't communicate your problem to your partner, it will affect both of you emotionally. Avoiding sex due to the fear of pain may be misinterpreted by your partner as a loss of interest or may give rise to a feeling of dissatisfaction and rejection. It may even affect other aspects of your life and lead to a stressful relationship. Therefore, it is critical to discuss these problems before they hamper your love life. Besides, it will also help you and your partner try alternatives and plan the activity so that both of you are sexually satisfied.

Keep the intimacy intact: Back pain or any other physical disability, for that matter, should not restrict or end the fun in your sexual relationship. Keep in mind that intercourse or penetrative sex is not the definition of lovemaking. Back pain should not stop you from kissing, stroking, touching, cuddling and caressing each other. Here are some tips to maintain intimacy in your sex life. (Read:The importance of foreplay and outercourse (Video)

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Tips for men

A passionate kiss on the lips can be a great way to start with but don't stop yourself there. Women like to be kissed on their neck and even on the back. So, explore what your woman likes. Also, nibbling, biting and licking are some options you can try if you want to spice it up further. Make her feel loved by your gentle touch. Slowly running your fingertips on her back, breasts, waist, butt, and between her thighs before you reach her vagina will definitely leave her aching for more. Here's a complete guide Penetrative sex: Foreplay, mutual masturbation, oral sex and more!

Tips for women

Men enjoy being touched and kissed all over too. Explore his back, chest and thighs before you give him the ultimate pleasure by touching his penis. Oral sex or even the 69 position is another option to make him go wild and experience a powerful orgasm at the same time. You can also use sex toys like the vibrating penis rings to stimulate his penis and get him all charged up.

Once you have built up the sexual intimacy, you're now all set for the journey to penetrative sex. But before you get there, understand that with severe back pain you will need to be in positions that keep your back in the neutral position. While some conditions that lead to back pain can make bending backward extremely difficult, others can make bending forward difficult. Those who experience more pain while bending backwards are extension intolerant while those experiencing pain with a forward bend are flexion intolerant. Here are some positions you should try.

Spooning: The best position for anyone with lower back pain due to spinal stenosis would be spooning. It suits both men and women with back pain, because pain due to spinal stenosis is experienced more while bending backwards or maintaining a straight posture. Spooning will allow you to lay in a side lying position with least involvement of the back. Also, while you're in this position, avoid vigorous thrusting movement to prevent straining the back. (Read: Top sex positions: Spooning)

Edge of the bed: Men who are comfortable bending forward slightly can try the edge of the bed sex position. Let your woman kneel on the edge of the bed while you enter from the behind bending forward slightly.

Doggy style: If your pain worsens as you slowly try to touch your feet, you're flexion intolerant. For men who experience such kind of pain, the doggy style position would serve the best. In this position, your partner lifts her upper body with the help of her arms, placing the palms and knees on the bed, while you penetrate from behind. A variation of the doggy-style position, where your partner rests her elbows on the bed instead of palms can be even more comfort.

The supported congress or the 'lover's' position: If standing upright in a neural position is not painful for you, then you should have sex in this position. In the lover's position, either you or your partner could rest their back against a wall or a pillar for support while other stands facing you. If the man is against the wall then the woman raises a leg to allow him to penetrate.

Missionary: Women suffering from back pain due to degenerative disc disease or disc herniation could be the most comfortable with the missionary position. If you have this condition, the missionary position is the best for you. The man could use his arm strength to prevent applying all his weight on you while you bend your knees to get them a bit closer to the chest as he penetrates. You could also use a pillow to support your lower back, keeping your spine in a neutral position. (Read:Top sex positions: Missionary)

Reverse missionary: Men with a similar kind of pain should let the woman be on the top. This position allows the back to rest without straining it much. (Read: Top sex positions: Woman on top)

Chair position: Women who are extension intolerant may be more comfortable in the chair position, where they need to sit facing their partner. In this position, you'll have to sit in your partner's lap with your legs open to allow him to slide in slowly. The advantage here is that you still have eye contact and can still continue to caress and kiss each other.

Sex with lying on the stomach: If your pain reduces with flexion or bending forward, you could lie on your stomach as your partner penetrates from the back.

Here are top sex positions you should try

Some tips to help you enjoy sex, despite back pain.

  • A warm water bath before sex can relax all your muscles and put you in a good mood.
  • If your pain is mild to moderate, stretch a bit before having sex. It will help maintain some flexibility during the act.
  • Wrap a towel around your lower back during sex if it hurts too much while in the neutral position.
  • You can always use pillows to feel more comfortable and reduce straining and arching your back.
  • Finally, plan your activities to enjoy it the most.

Image source: Getty Images

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