Editorial Team
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Written By: Editorial Team | Updated : June 11, 2014 6:45 PM IST

No man or woman is ever prepared to be told he or she has cancer, but some of us simply have to deal with it. Here's a true cancer account by RJ Singh Oberoi who was diagnosed with cardiac sarcoma a rare type of heart cancer.
A few months after my mother passed away in May 2012, I was diagnosed with cancer. After the diagnosis, I got three different opinions and the verdict was the same I had heart cancer. They told me the chances of survival were very low. I was advised to get the tumour removed by my doctor. I was very nervous before the surgery. However, after I regained consciousness, the doctor assured me that he had got the entire tumour out but I would have to undergo radiotherapy treatments. Because I was not in the last stage of the disease, docs were hopeful that I'd survive.
My family was very shocked, except for a distant aunt no one had ever been diagnosed with cancer. I was going through a very dark phase, my father passed away and my girlfriend broke up with me. My brothers and sisters tried to create their world around me but I didn't want that. I insisted on going alone for my treatment because I didn't want them to bear the burden. I started to get bitter and would sometimes lash out at them but thankfully they understood and would calm me down.
Here are some things I learned that I hope can assist other cancer patients.
Communication
A two-way communication street is very important for people suffering from cancer. It was difficult for me to tell my friends and family about my diagnosis. The first week I simply didn't know what to do. Over time I opened up to my loved ones and realised that I felt much better after sharing it with them and was overwhelmed by the support I received. Communication is the key to everything. If you are open to your loved ones - you will understand each other's feeling. It's not only a tough ride for a cancer patient but also for the people around him/her.
Dare to ask questions
Most cancer patients are scared to ask questions. That's a bad idea. You need to know what you're going through, understanding is the first step. Write down your questions before you visit the doctor. If you don't understand what he says, ask him to explain again. After all it's all about you.
Live healthy
Maintaining a healthy lifestyle is important. I have always led an active lifestyle, enjoyed sports and I think that's the reason that I'm doing so well in the fight against cancer. But make sure you check with your doctor before starting any physical regimen. Also ensure you're getting enough adequate nutrition because the treatment can be hard on your body.
De-stress
It's good to take it easy once in a while. Find out what works best for you, what hobby you prefer. I found that alternative therapy really helped me reduce stress. I started with Ayurveda treatments to balance mind and body. I also played the piano and wrote, all of which helped me deal with my pain and also gave me a way to express my feelings.
Don't stop believing
I know it's not easy to be positive all the time. Everyone has dreams and cancer can restrict that or curtail those aspirations for a while. The disease restricted my life in many ways. In time I learned more about myself and realised that I just wanted to live. I became a newer, better version of myself. Dealing with it's not easy but I try my best. It's frustrating sometimes but I try to live each day to the fullest. And lastly if you're the relative or friend of a cancer patient who's reading this, don't leave them they need you. Even lending an ear or a simple hug can make a huge impact. Try to understand them and their feelings but don't treat them all the time like they're diagnosed with cancer. Just treat them the way you used to before.
Read more about causes, symptoms, diagnosis and treatment of cancer.
'Strength is life, weakness is death. Expansion is life, contraction is death. Love is life, hatred is death' Swami Vivekananda
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